The Corrupted Wish Game

[jadnifer]

Granted....You now hate competing SO much that you let people walk all over you.

I wish that I had my own house.

[~Tszura~]

Granted!

You are now the proud owner of a beautiful Victorian Mansion nestled in the Hollywood Hills. Unfortunately, its right next to Barry Manilow who has the habit of playing his own music 24/7 and LOUD!! Hope you like "Mandy" and "Copacabana!"

I wish I could cook

[jadnifer]

Congraulations...you have gotten a degree and have become a Master Chef.

However, you put some food on the stove and fell asleep and the pot boiled over and caught your house on fire.

[creatureofthenyte]

Congradulations! you suffered a brainfart, and forgot to make your wish. Damn does it ever stink in here.

I wish to win a bajilligozillion dollars.

[~Tszura~]

LOL

Congratulations! You just won a bajilligozillion dollars! Unfortunately, the year is 3145, and paper money has no value. You won it all when you picked what was behind door number 3 on the futuristic version of “Let’s Make a Deal” and instead of going home with 3 barrels of water (Highly valued), you won the ancient paper money of no absolutely value. sorry!

I wish I could talk to animals.

[Burrich1]

Congratulations!! LOL!!!

You may now talk to animals. Both the animals and all of the people around you looks at you strangely whenever you partake in your new found skill. You are absolutely convinced this was not a talent you had prior to making this wish. In fact, you just had a very long one sided conversation with a couple of squirrels in the park on the pros and cons of horse chestnuts vs. black walnuts.

Your friends and family become very concerned for your well being, and before long, they force you to sign away your power of attorney and have you committed to a psychiatric ward. Here, you are miserable because there are only a few odd bugs to talk to and you don't feel you have all that much in common. (Oh, did you want the animals to understand you?)

I wish I was a regular actor in Hal Hartley movies.

[Bernadette]

Poof!

You are now on the set of a HH movie .. or so you think! Except your real life is now a dark comedy... muuuaaaaaHHHH!

I wish I had nine lives...

[anametamystik]

Poof!

You are now on the set of a HH movie .. or so you think! Except your real life is now a dark comedy... muuuaaaaaHHHH!

I wish I had nine lives...

Yes, you're a cat... a black cat... You're chased by frat boys and teenagers wanting to make a satanic sacrifice and refused adoption out of the pet adoption center for that very reason. By the way, you're also lactose intolerant (no milk for you) and only 13 inches tall.

*********************

I wish to be a tattooed freak.

[jarmana]

Granted...(POOF!) You are now a tatooed freak! ..... except the tatoo artist can only draw red dots. now you look like you have the measles.... Congradulations.

I wish I had X-Ray Vision.

[anametamystik]

Granted...(POOF!) You are now a tatooed freak! ..... except the tatoo artist can only draw red dots. now you look like you have the measles.... Congradulations.

I wish I had X-Ray Vision.

Granted... you can now see through clothes and flesh. Unfortunately, it never turns off. Oh, and you're relocated by g-men to Groom Lake. I hope you have a medical fetish for anal probes.

****************

I wish for a wish that cannot be corrupted be granted to me.

[Msterbeau]

Your wish is granted by Microsoft but then it gets corrupted like all their other software.

I wish I could make up my mind.

[anametamystik]

Granted... A horrible accident while walking in 8" platforms causes a MAC pencil to go through your skull. You subsequently fall into your makeup kit.

**************

I wish I starred in a circus.

[Guest GodfallenPromos]

Granted...you as the star of a circus...as "Sally, the Seal girl".

I wish that every day was a good day

Edited May 15, 2008 by GodfallenPromos

[hunhee]

Granted.. every day is sunny and beautiful, the birds are chirping and the there's nothing to worry about at all.. You don't have to work because you're independently wealthy, everything you want is just a finger snap away. Every movie, every CD, every piece of technology is yours at your fingertips, yes, you are living the good life.. How did you get here my you ask? Your penis and male parts were lost in a freak boating accident. You sued for damages, and now you don't have to even worry about anything, women, money, headaches.. this is definitely the life.

I wish my friends were happy. ..

[Guest GodfallenPromos]

Granted....my male parts grow back....everyone is estactic...you just can't figure out why....and end up spiralling down into a deep depression on how that makes all your friends happy

I wish I could have fucked Cleopatra.

[hunhee]

Granted.. You find yourself immersed in the Egyptian culture where the beautiful Cleopatra rules the Nile River. When she encounters your tall dark mass of manliness, she falls instantly in lust with you and wants you as her very own. You guys have a long night of torrid bliss where you do every position imaginable.. All of a sudden, you hear some angry man trying to beat down the door, you realize that it's Mark Anthony, and he's HUGELY jealous.. all of a sudden you're frantic and you don't know what to do.. Just as Mark Anthony gains access into the bedroom chamber, you wake up in a Cemetery in Michigan where you realized you must have passed out from exhaustion from digging up a grave that was marked.. Cleopatra, you realize that you had passed out amongst the bones of the now occupier of the grave site... (I won't go into detail what you might have been doing to those bones, because I'm not that sick in the head..hehe or AM I? *coughsnecrophiliaccoughs*)

I wish I had more time in the day to do good deeds..

[Guest GodfallenPromos]

Granted....you have all the time in the world to do as many good deeds as you want....but no matter how many times you attempt a good deed, the person the good deed was done for gets shot in the head by a mysterious figure dressed in stark yellow robes. You discover that you can only stop this process by standing on your head for three hours while spinning in place while singing "i believe in a thing called love" by The Darkness while watching the music video for FOB's cover of "Beat It". Presented with this horrid task...not so much the spinning or the head standing..but the music video...you are left with nothing but some odd guy in a yellow robe, and a trail of bodies.

I wish I could have met Evel Knieval.

[Burrich1]

Granted!!!!

Prior to his death, Evil Knieval's agent contacted you and 78 other individuals to help him break the world record for "most people lying head-to-toe jumped over by a motorcyclist. On fire. In the snow. More than happy to do this for your hero, you jump at the chance, and are looking forward to the post-record-setting-after-party where you can chat with your idol. While drawing straws for this feat, you end up the last person in this line of human fodder. I mean heroic stunt assistants. While lying on the ground, shivering, with your eyes closed trying to think what you're going to say to your luminary, you hear the revving of the motorcycle engine. You can't wait! It will be over any second! You hear a gasp from the onlookers and open your eyes just in time to see the back tire of Mr. Knieval's bike land...

...Guess where? Nothing grows back in the corrupted wish game. muaaaahaaaaahaaaaa!!!!!

I wish I didn't have issues with anxiety.

Edited May 16, 2008 by Burrich1

[anametamystik]

granted... you meet Evil in a from the beyond the grave stunt special Reality TV show. Unfortunately, the dead can't drive and the motorcycle chases you down.

***********

I wish to swallow swords.

[Msterbeau]

Granted. I don't think I need to corrupt that in any way.

I wish for you.

[hunhee]

Granted.. anametamystik appears magically in your bedroom.. all dressed as beautifully as she is in her picture... You think WOAH wishes really DO come true.. You both get entwined in some passionate kissing and deep mutual touching..when all of a sudden, you notice your hands are bound and she has you in such a position that your head is looking upward toward the ceiling..

This is where she tells you.. instead of ME swallowing the swords, YOU'RE going to swallow the swords.. so amazing enough, she has swords of varying lengths and thicknesses appear out of thin air.. She begins to insert them into your mouth one by one.. the whole time you're horrified to even move for fear of being pierced by her sharp deep swords..

hehehe.. I'll leave it at that..

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I wish I knew all the answers to all the questions that have been haunting mankind for centuries..

[jarmana]

Granted.. anametamystik appears magically in your bedroom.. all dressed as beautifully as she is in her picture... You think WOAH wishes really DO come true.. You both get entwined in some passionate kissing and deep mutual touching..when all of a sudden, you notice your hands are bound and she has you in such a position that your head is looking upward toward the ceiling..

This is where she tells you.. instead of ME swallowing the swords, YOU'RE going to swallow the swords.. so amazing enough, she has swords of varying lengths and thicknesses appear out of thin air.. She begins to insert them into your mouth one by one.. the whole time you're horrified to even move for fear of being pierced by her sharp deep swords..

hehehe.. I'll leave it at that..

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I wish I knew all the answers to all the questions that have been haunting mankind for centuries..

Granted! You now know why men have nipples, why dogs have wet noses, and what really happens to your spirit when you die.... the horrifying details of true hell, and the real bliss that is heaven. Unfortunatly you also realize that for everything you know about death, you can't stop your own fate of going to hell. Enjoy the eternal fire! Until then the images of hell will never escape your mind and dreams. You cry at night catching glimpses of heaven, knowing you will never be accepted in. But look on the bright side..... you now know what happened on the grassy knoll, and what really happens at Area 51.

I wish the world got rid of the monetary system.

[anametamystik]

Granted. No more money.

You pay your phone bill in coffee, the electric with cigarettes and your gas bill with beans. To buy oranges, you need to trade a paper clip for a pen, which you then trade for a folder, which you then trade for a few bags, which you then trade for a bag of oranges.

******

I wish some people who get hung up on being so original would just learn to enjoy doing whatever they do for fun instead of trying to be more original than thou.

[Msterbeau]

Granted. Those people are now stuck working for the RIAA protecting the copyrights of bland, talentless pop "stars".

I wish I could work from home.

Edited May 16, 2008 by Msterbeau

[Guest GodfallenPromos]

Granted!!!!

Prior to his death, Evil Knieval's agent contacted you and 78 other individuals to help him break the world record for "most people lying head-to-toe jumped over by a motorcyclist. On fire. In the snow. More than happy to do this for your hero, you jump at the chance, and are looking forward to the post-record-setting-after-party where you can chat with your idol. While drawing straws for this feat, you end up the last person in this line of human fodder. I mean heroic stunt assistants. While lying on the ground, shivering, with your eyes closed trying to think what you're going to say to your luminary, you hear the revving of the motorcycle engine. You can't wait! It will be over any second! You hear a gasp from the onlookers and open your eyes just in time to see the back tire of Mr. Knieval's bike land...

...Guess where? Nothing grows back in the corrupted wish game. muaaaahaaaaahaaaaa!!!!!

I wish I didn't have issues with anxiety.

thats such a terriable thing for my grandmother's ex boyfriend to do to me.....and yes...thats true