Moderating Topics

[Blackmail]

Really, it's just a message board. I don't think any of you should lose sleep because a thread was closed.

[Blackmail]

oh yeah and one more thing, I heart the moderators. =)

[Guest Megalicious]

I'll make you this promise Meg: that I'll give this a great deal of thought....ok?

Steve

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I always give what you have to say (or anyone else that happens to post something serious) a great deal of thought, it's not a matter of changing minds, it's a matter of seeing something in a new light and learing from that.

For me it a matter of learing to become more empathic, not only to be aware of someone elses feelings and try to see from their point of view, but how they effect me as well.

Due what you will Steven, you need not make any promises .. but it was a nice gesture and thank you =)

[Brenda Starrr]

oh yeah and one more thing, I heart the moderators.  =)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Does that mean that you don't love me anymore or that you never did?

[Steven]

I always give what you have to say (or anyone else that happens to post something serious) a great deal of thought, it's not a matter of changing minds, it's a matter of seeing something in a new light and learing from that.

For me it a matter of learing to become more empathic, not only to be aware of someone elses feelings and try to see from their point of view, but how they effect me as well.

Due what you will Steven, you need not make any promises .. but it was a nice gesture and thank you =)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[honeymustard02]

I think that's exactly why people reacted the way they did.

Most people took it as bragging and that made them mad. It made me extremely mad because I'm going through a situation of dealing with two people just like this. That's why it sent ME off the deep end.

Maybe it was a round about way of asking for help. But I'm sure if as many people that claim to be his friends on this board were really his friends he could have gone to them.

If everyone who knows him personally off the board really cares then maybe they need to get together and get this guy some help. If possible, I don't know who lives near him. Instead of pointing fingers at who said what to piss who off. You care so much then put it to action and get him help. Don't just post on a board.

Just a side note. Tough love does work in some cases. Sometimes if you threaten to take away that one thing they need it scares them into getting clean.

One thing to keep in mind here (and yes some people do ask for help in this passive aggressive way) Is the DD, didn't ask for help.... he bragged about it... He basically said to all of us "ain't it cool?" and people reacted... some felt sorry for him, others (myself included) thought that doing, and then bragging about this was not something to feel sympathy for...

just saying

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Fierce Critter]

I, too, went off as a result of the braggadocio in his post.

It was mentioned in another thread regarding this issue how people on the board have "enabled" DD's behavior by treating it lightly and humourously.

I can honestly say I've never contributed in that way. I've seen it, and heard about it, and kept my mouth shut, neither condemning nor encouraging it.

I have observed, and found it sad and unkind that behavior like this has been responded to in such a way for certain person(s). Then I've seen other people who have honestly sought help & advice for their own addictions & self-destructive behaviors - humbly admitting their fault & negative behaviors - and been crucified for it.

I don't really understand the double standard. It really does seem to come down to a popularity thing.

[Scary Guy]

Think I should clear the air a little, I don't care that he's an addict, I personally just don't like him for a few reasons (most of which were stated in that thread and I'll just let those stay there).

I do agree that medication might help him, however, not that type.

I know a few "functional addicts" such as a friend of mine who takes vic's every so often just to get through the pain of every day life (he can get quite depressed sometimes). However he doesn't abuse them and normally he's fine. He's got the ability to see when he's losing control and acts accordingly to correct that.

Dave on the other hand does not have this ability it seems and one of these days he's going to do something to get himself thrown in a jail, in a mental institution, or in a hole in the ground.

As far as the play nice rules, I don't like them but I respect them (most of the time, unless I see a great need to speak my mind, and at that point I'll usually request a topic lock myself so I don't get myself banned).

[Homicidalheathen]

[

It was mentioned in another thread regarding this issue how people on the board have "enabled" DD's behavior by treating it lightly and humourously.

I am or WAS guilty of this. I am with Piggy on this one. Tough love is in order now.

[Blackmail]

I guess I am one of the alleged enablers. I find his posts to be amusing. I like Dave but don't know him too well. I assumed his posts about cheating on his wife with her twin sister until she got put in a mental hospital, his references to women's body parts, his constant remarks about vicodin (especially this last one) were all part of his "schtick", so I assumed I had no responsibility other than to laugh.

He said he could bend the rules at his apartment complex because his dad was sleeping with the manager. How am I not supposed to laugh?

sorry.

[Homicidalheathen]

And he IS fun to hang out/party with.......but I would not want to live with him heh.

[honeymustard02]

That's the problem. Everyone loves to hang out with the party people, but no one gives a crap what happens afterwards.

They only want to see the happy partier and not the broken down abuser. It's sad really. I think that sets drug addicts and who ever into a cycle of leading a double life. They feel to be that happy party person they need their drugs. That way they'll know people will want to be with them. They're afraid to let their problems show and take the chance of scaring off the people they think are friends.

[Dollardave]

DAVE - change it.

peace.

Steven

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Fierce Critter]

I enjoy taking drugs and give them to my friends when I go to city club and they are more than happy to accept them.

This is the main thing that struck me out of that entire post.

How many of these people would still be a "friend" if the handouts stopped?

I find the whole thing so, so sad. I've got my own addictions, but thankfully they're not ones that cause such clouded judgment and... loneliness.

I do feel for addicts, believe it or not. But I know when there's nothing I can do to help them except to not act like I approve of their behavior.

Good luck, Dave. Got my own opinion of you, but I don't wish you ill. Hope, someday, you get the help you don't think you need.

[JaneDead]

You're lucky I don't beat your ass if I see you at city club.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

sort of sounds like a threat? i know names weren't named but probably not a good idea to say something like this in an open forum. and dave, you brought this upon yourself. how did you think people would react?

[Blackmail]

sort of sounds like a threat? i know names weren't named but probably not a good idea to say something like this in an open forum. and dave, you brought this upon yourself. how did you think people would react?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Probably true but alot of people say things just as crazy and potentially offensive as Dollar Dave and people aren't allowed to criticize. The argument for that may be because what DD did hurts society but I could make the same argument for the actions of what a few on DGN do as well, especially those with kids who brag about X and Y. And JaneDead I better not see you at City Club or I'll beat your high score at pac-man.

[JaneDead]

And JaneDead I better not see you at City Club or I'll beat your high score at pac-man.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

i already know you probably can so i won't even go up for the challenge

[Guest Megalicious]

I'll never change.

That is your choice, however by saying I'll NEVER change, is only hurting you and the people that care about you. People that love you dont want to see you in and out of Mental hospitals because you need your "fix". I hope even if you don't post here any more that you are reading this Dave. I can't say I know you well, but that doesnt mean I lack compassion. I hope one day for you that never comes. Not only for your sake but the people around you.

I can't believe that a new thread was started by moderators.

It wasn't started by modertators it was split by mods .. there is a difference....

You don't have to worry about me posting anymore cuz i'm leaving bye and fuck you to all that insulted me. 

Like I said I hope that you return at least to fliter through the advice that people have given you here, though it may not be what you want to hear now, perhaps it's something you should hear. I like you Dave, at least what I know of you.. I've met you a few times, the way you live your life is the way you live your life .. Im not here to judge, I have done some fucked up shit in my past, so there is no way I can bash you for what you are doing with your life ..

But take in what some of us said, realize that some post are objective because they dont know you ... and that is the best advice you can get, someone without love or hate for you... because they have no reason to lie, they have no hidden agenda.

I wish you well, take care of yourself.

[Msterbeau]

Dave, your response to this is all the proof any of us with addictions needs that you're in complete denial of what's really hurting you. I don't know what that is, I can't make you face it or change your mind to seek help. There are only two things I can say with any certainty. Something will happen to change your mind to seek help... or you will die from your addiction and deprive the world of your presence. I hope, for your sake and that of the people who care about you, that it's the former. I don't hate you, I'm ceratinly not jealous of you... I just want to see you get on the path to a healthier life.

[Steven]

DAVE - change it.

peace.

Steven

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I enjoy taking drugs and give them to my friends when I go to city club and they are more than happy to accept them. I'll never change and I think its ridiculous of people telling me how to run my life. I enjoy taking my drugs just like all of you enjoy your drinking pot use or whatever your vice is. I can't believe that a new thread was started by moderators. Anyways I'm leaving dgn becuz I can't stand some of the people they secretly hated me becuz i'm a womanizer and now they had a chance to attack and took it. How weak. They're just jealous cuz they can't find a woman and I've kissed almost all the women on dgn anyways including farril who attacked me in a pm. You don't have to worry about me posting anymore cuz i'm leaving bye and fuck you to all that insulted me. You're lucky I don't beat your ass if I see you at city club.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Brenda Starrr]

They're just jealous cuz they can't find a woman and I've kissed almost all the women on dgn anyways including farril who attacked me in a pm.

:blink

No one is jealous. Trust me.

[honeymustard02]

Lol That's funny because I wouldn't touch you with a 10ft pole.

QUOTE

They're just jealous cuz they can't find a woman and I've kissed almost all the women on dgn anyways including farril who attacked me in a pm.

[wheresmypiggy]

I'm going to regret this in some sense I'm sure.. but here it goes.

Fuck all of you. Seriously. I have encountered some of you who say they have had an addiction and beat it. Good for you. Congratulations. Do you want a fucking cookie.

Why do I want to stay clean? Why? Because everyone else says that I have to. Everyone else says what I do is wrong. My only reason for wanting to stay clean is to please everyone else.

Sure I have alot of underlying problems. Some of you have heard my rants or stories of kindnapping, sexual abuse, stalking, beatings. Yeah. I had a rough life.

When I reached out for help my hand was slapped down and so I turned to what I knew.

DRUGS.

I love drugs. I love doing them. I love they way they make me feel. I love that when I am on them I can function in everyday life.

Yes. I'm a functional addict. Yes. I've been to the end of the line and back again.

My heart has stopped. My family has cried. I have numerous health problems now.

BUT YOU FUCKING KNOW WHAT?!

Those are the only times I felt comfortable. It is the easy way out. I know this.

On a daily basis for quite some time I would sniff 2 packs of heroin a day. Not enough to get you high. Or me for that matter. But enough to function.

This makes me an addict.

How different is someone who takes zoloft or prozac daily?

I see the difference. Moderated drug use. and legality.

DD and I have several big differences but for the most part our problem is the same.

Neither of us want to quit. We enjoy the people that we are.

I've heard over and over that this is a board where we give support and advice to each other. Bashing someone for their "way of life" is not support. Calling them names is not advice.

I'm not saying you cannot have your own opinion.

The problem I'm seeing here is this:

DD wanted to post about his experience.

Other people were offended by his methods.

Everyone went on the defense.

Everyone threw a tantrum.

And now we are back to the root of human nature.

Whining and bitching and holding a grudge.

Our maturity levels are dwindeling.

DD did what he did for his own reasons. Would you rather he had kept his problem to his self? Then one day you find out by mistake and hate him for not being open and honest?

Swinging door.

Don't get smacked in the face.

You can't make him or anyone else live their lives the way you want.

If you become offended by their words or actions, say merely that. Give you opinion, advice or whatever and move on.

If you want to create a debate do it in an adult like manor.

You choose your friends. Not their lives.

These are the dark sides of life. Not everything is as you think it should be. Not everyone is who you think they should be.

Now for those of you who are offended by me, my actions, my words, my choices. That is your perogative (sp). I bet you never stop to think how often you might offend me. So maybe you don't care about the feeling of a junkie. How about the feelings of another human being. How many of you read the bible "love thy neighbor". Well hey guess what? I'm your fucking neighbor. I don't ask for love, compassion or for you to even like me. But I do ask this. If you have a problem with me bring it to me in a mature fashion. Either we can work it out or go on in our seperate ways. God forgives us all, remember? Maybe to you I don't deserve forgiveness. Maybe DD doesnt either. But maybe just maybe when we ask for it we are being sincere. How do you know what goes on in someone elses head?

Ok. I'm done.

[Blackmail]

I'm going to regret this in some sense I'm sure.. but here it goes.

Fuck all of you. Seriously. I have encountered some of you who say they have had an addiction and beat it. Good for you. Congratulations. Do you want a fucking cookie.

Why do I want to stay clean? Why? Because everyone else says that I have to. Everyone else says what I do is wrong. My only reason for wanting to stay clean is to please everyone else.

Sure I have alot of underlying problems. Some of you have heard my rants or stories of kindnapping, sexual abuse, stalking, beatings. Yeah. I had a rough life.

When I reached out for help my hand was slapped down and so I turned to what I knew.

DRUGS.

I love drugs. I love doing them. I love they way they make me feel. I love that when I am on them I can function in everyday life.

Yes. I'm a functional addict. Yes. I've been to the end of the line and back again.

My heart has stopped. My family has cried. I have numerous health problems now.

BUT YOU FUCKING KNOW WHAT?!

Those are the only times I felt comfortable. It is the easy way out. I know this.

On a daily basis for quite some time I would sniff 2 packs of heroin a day. Not enough to get you high. Or me for that matter. But enough to function.

This makes me an addict.

How different is someone who takes zoloft or prozac daily?

I see the difference. Moderated drug use. and legality.

DD and I have several big differences but for the most part our problem is the same.

Neither of us want to quit. We enjoy the people that we are.

I've heard over and over that this is a board where we give support and advice to each other. Bashing someone for their "way of life" is not support. Calling them names is not advice.

I'm not saying you cannot have your own opinion.

The problem I'm seeing here is this:

DD wanted to post about his experience.

Other people were offended by his methods.

Everyone went on the defense.

Everyone threw a tantrum.

And now we are back to the root of human nature.

Whining and bitching and holding a grudge.

Our maturity levels are dwindeling.

DD did what he did for his own reasons. Would you rather he had kept his problem to his self? Then one day you find out by mistake and hate him for not being open and honest?

Swinging door.

Don't get smacked in the face.

You can't make him or anyone else live their lives the way you want.

If you become offended by their words or actions, say merely that. Give you opinion, advice or whatever and move on.

If you want to create a debate do it in an adult like manor.

You choose your friends. Not their lives.

These are the dark sides of life. Not everything is as you think it should be. Not everyone is who you think they should be.

Now for those of you who are offended by me, my actions, my words, my choices. That is your perogative (sp). I bet you never stop to think how often you might offend me. So maybe you don't care about the feeling of a junkie. How about the feelings of another human being. How many of you read the bible "love thy neighbor". Well hey guess what? I'm your fucking neighbor. I don't ask for love, compassion or for you to even like me. But I do ask this. If you have a problem with me bring it to me in a mature fashion. Either we can work it out or go on in our seperate ways. God forgives us all, remember? Maybe to you I don't deserve forgiveness. Maybe DD doesnt either. But maybe just maybe when we ask for it we are being sincere. How do you know what goes on in someone elses head?

Ok. I'm done.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

can I make this my signature?

[Guest Megalicious]

If you want to create a debate do it in an adult like manor.

exactly