add me to the list - clinical depression and anxiety disorder. i have been (consciously) dealing with this for almost 10 years.
i am fascinated by how very different each person's experience can be...
for example, jynx - i WANTED to die for about two years. up until 2 or 3 years ago i saw death as a blessing and a beautiful release.
jinonfire -
i also had terrible side effects from paxil, including partial neuropathy (couldn't feel my left foot), terrible vertigo, and sexual dysfunction (i couldn't have an orgasm for 3 months). after working with a few different docs, i have found a combination that minimizes my physical symptoms and helps me to lead a positive and productive life. in other words, there may be something out there that will make things easier.
3 things that have helped me regain my self and my life...
- therapy
- medication
- learning about and applying philosophy, coping mechanisms, self-acceptance, etc
i still hope to get away from the meds someday, but i'm not there yet.
you are not alone in your experiences, there are people here who are happy to listen...
remember that even small progress is still progress.
if all you can do is maintain, at least you're not moving backwards.
if all you can do is make it through the day, the night, the hour - then there is still hope that it will get better.