Jump to content

Is the glass half empty or half full?


Recommended Posts

My glass is always empty, and then I fill it with beer to the top, and in five minutes it's empty again; then I get more beer.

My glass is always empty, and then I fill it with beer to the top, and in five minutes it's empty again; then I get more beer.
Edited by Chernobyl
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Engineer's answer: The glass's design is inefficiently designed for the quality of liquid that it is meant to contain.

Chemist's answer: The glass is full, one half with liquid one half with gas.

Skeptic's answer: I am not convinced there is a glass with or without liquid.

Religious answer: It doesn't matter, it's up to God.

Nihilist's answer: The glass is nothing!

etc....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My glass is always half empty-I would wait to have something good confirmed so I can get all excited instead of start out all happy and excited and than get knocked to the floor with disappointment when things don't work out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Writer's answer: The exterior of the glass was shiny, and betrayed the color of the liquid inside it's volume, taking up precisely one half of it's capacity.

Badly Translated Engrish answer: Glass full half not maybe fun fun.

Gamer Geek's answer: Dude, is that hot Valerye chick holding the glass?... Awesome, I roll my charisma to try and do her.

Emo's answer: It doesn't matter, she fell in love with that other guy who is into sports, and life just sucks.... you want to hang out in my mom's basement for a while, I have the new Fall Out Boy?

DGNr's answer: What was the question? I can't tell because it's the end of the month and neither myself nor anyone else has donated in a while ;p

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was speaking to a therapist so that she could get an idea as to the type of person my wife lives with and determin a course of action. I thought the concept was amazingly intelligent.

After several sessions that had me biting my tongue because of the stupid questions used to illicit stock responses, I gave this response.

Is there any additional information you want to give me?

OK, then do not say a word to me until I tell you I am finished.

If the glass starts out empty and you add liquid to the half point then from one perspective it is half full because you where in the act of filling but from another perspective it is half empty if you consider the state it started at. If you fill the glass then remove liquid both statements would still be true and absolutely none of them can be used to determine if a person is a pessimist or an optimist.

As I was walking to the door.

Where did you get your degree, the Freud University for Retard Therapists?

I poked my head back in.

Don't worry, I'm not going to tell my wife your a hack, she will figure it out in time. And just in case you didn't notice, I am never going to tell you I'm finished.

Anyway, my basic answer has always been based on the direction of the liquids travel.

always = as long as I can remember. My mother also claims that I would say I don't know or what glass.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Now...is the stripper half naked or half clothed?

Depends.... on waayyy too many things.... how attractive is she? How much money do you have? how long has she been there? etc...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

how long has she been there? etc...

Yes, because we all know how unsatisfactory it is to open the bag and reach in, only to pull out a stale stripper.

Yes, because we all know how unsatisfactory it is to open the bag and reach in, only to pull out a stale stripper.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes, because we all know how unsatisfactory it is to open the bag and reach in, only to pull out a stale stripper.

If by bag you mean them staying on the pole or stage long after their unsatisfactory dance has been completed then yes...stale strippers are bad.

Or do you mean when you think that she showered before work but then you get into the champagne room and...FISH!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It depends on the contents of the glass, if it's a favorable liquid like say.. rum.. it's half fucking empty!

However, if it contains an unfavorable liquid like say piss... half full, and why the fuck would someone fill a glass half way with piss?

Because they have a tiny bladder and didn't want to pass it to someone else?

Because they are convinced that Japanese health fads are cool and haven't worked up to drinking an entire glass?

Because their artistic nature likes the contrast when light passes through it?

Because they are going add some detergent foam on the surface and try to pass it off to their buddy as Budweiser?

Just because?

Because if they are demented enough to piss in a glass for no reason then they are demented enough to piss on a dog and their dog walked by when the glass was half filled?

Edited by Vater Araignee
Link to comment
Share on other sites

to be honest, the entire question is invalid, as it's physically impossible for the glass to be exactly half-empty/full, due to the nature of heat-related expansion of gases (air), liquids, and solids (the glass).

so the answer would have to be, "it can't be either...".

:rolleyes:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Forum Statistics

    38.8k
    Total Topics
    819.8k
    Total Posts
  • Who's Online   0 Members, 0 Anonymous, 64 Guests (See full list)

    • There are no registered users currently online
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.