FarrIL

I'm single and had to repeat myself to the same person "I said no, I meant no". Told the guy "dont get your hopes up" and he still tried to say "I say we're dating now!" Um, no. That's a decision made by two people and I told you already it wasnt going to happen. Disappointed you are. Care I do not.

I'm going to chime in here with some advice and a small rant... The word "Compromise" is a BAD word. It's among the ultimate tools to sabotage a relationship. When you compromise something to be in a relationship, it begins a downward spiral that eventually destroys the relationship. I compromised a lot of myself in my longest relationship and it was all to his whim, not mine. There were many things I couldnt do because I compromised who I was, what I was and what I wanted to do. All because of his insecurities and his limitations. I sacrificed, compromised, a lot over the course of 2 1/2 years and when I realized that I no longer had to, I felt damn free. What you need to find is the gentle medium. It's different than a compromise. When I've seen compromises, someone's getting what they want while the other is left with less than nothing. A gentle medium means you both have found something you BOTH can and do agree on. Best example I can give you wasnt relationship-oriented but the lesson's the same: When I started dressing differently and catering to the alternative style, my mom flipped while my dad gave me a listening ear. He did make mention of his disapproval of some of the things I wore as they werent appropriate for family functions. However, in due time, sure I'd wear jeans but if the jeans were long, I wore my platforms. I was still wearing boots but wearing clothing that, while they were more appropriate for family get-togethers, they were still on my terms. That's the same with a relationship. You find what works for the both of you. Never someone getting their way while the other's left with zilch. A relationship wont work if you have to compromise a part of who you are, just to be with someone. The more you compromise, the more they have you under control (in the bad way). If you compromise something now, they'll make you keep doing it just to see how far they can go. Dont fall for it.

This is a JUST IN CASE matter. The person I'm supposed to be getting a place with in a few months is still having some financial issues related, which make me more nervous the longer they continue. We still hope to get an apartment together (she's a coworker of mine so this would be a big convenience for both of us) come September but again, she doesnt have a working vehicle and the steps she's taken to try and get it fixed have thrown her into brick walls every which way. So, I'm trying to come up with a plan B or more. I know I cant afford a place on my own just yet but in time, I probably could once I get some money saved up and get another raise at work. I might be looking for a place to stay, a roommate situation. If you live in or around Warren (so Roseville, Eastpointe, Ferndale, Sterling Heights, Berkley, etc), and you're looking for a person (or another person) to help with rent and utilities, let me know. I'm used to paying $350 a month (which includes my share of rent and utilities). If I'm closer to work, I wont be driving around as much and therefore could afford a little more if necessary but right now, $350 is all I can do. Again, this is just in case Plan A doesnt pan out, which I'm slowly starting to think it wont. If anyone is looking to gain a roommate by September/October, send me a message ASAP. Otherwise, I know I wont have a place to stay once my sister and her husband move out (and I wont be welcome to an extent... they'll want their own place so they can start a family). Thanks in advance. =)

Single as of the 17th. We're still friends though and that's fine by the both of us. I'm actually enjoying my freedom.

Taken last Friday. Was practicing with my bendy tripod. o.o

Sorry I've been MIA lately folks. Job hunting still and stuck at a job that works not-so-consistent hours. However, I go in tomorrow for a 2nd interview to host at another restaurant and next week, I have a follow-up interview with another company. So here's me hoping that I can make a post in a few days saying "NEW JOB! Money's abound!" meaning I might be able to come out on a Wednesday here and there. And when those days happen, DJs beware. I come with requests. Lots of requests.

I'll hold you to it Nocker. Dont worry, once I start at the job I have (or if a full-time one pops up in the meantime), I wont be so worried.

Sorry guys, I have to pass on coming out tonight. Currently dont have an influx of cash as of today, yet waiting to start at my new job. So, cant drive around too much. D:

This is actually my sister's crafty store and she isnt limited to just crocheting. She's done floral decor for weddings and she makes soaps and hemp jewelry. I've been her willing guinea pig for years. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Frazzled-Owl-Crochet/212086675495486 ---- her Facebook page Anyway, if she can find a pattern for it, she can make it. She isnt limited to hats and scarves, she can make anything from blankets, purses, rattles, cuddly pillow-friends and other goodies. I've lost count how many bags and hats I have from her but she can cater to any taste, not just my love for dark 'n' cutesy. She's been doing a ton of hats lately for Hallowe'en and even if we dont want to admit it, winter is coming and her hats are WARM! Give her page a "like" and she's prompt in responses and turnover. (Totally not just talking her up because she's my sister... I freaking love her stuff!)

You could always say "Oh I do have kids. I have three. They're furry, walk on all fours, use a litter box and sleep on my chest when I fall asleep on the couch." Imagine the looks. Or "I do have a kid... I just give him back to his real mother after her and daddy had their date night." Not having kids makes it easier to babysit other peoples' kids. I love kids, love playing with them and watching movies with them and all that but if I had a kid of my own, and that kid was sick... I'd miss out on a chunk of spare cash. Which ends up inconveniencing more people than just me. Not having kids, I think, also enabled me to put forth more effort when I tutored over the summer. My teacher herself admitted, "I dont think I could do it... deal with all these kids and then come home to my own." She's in her mid-30s and no babies for her. I think we both agreed that not having kids helped us apply more of ourselves to the job duties we were performing. Managing that many kids, even with just the two of us, got hectic at times. Doing that on lack of sleep because your own kid kept waking up.... no, I'll pass.

I'm all for it. People get married quick and then get divorced after just a few years' worth of marriage, so yeah, making a 2-year temporary marriage sounds like a good idea. See if it works out and after two years, either renew or walk away. Sounds like a Handfasting, only with paper involved.

A former coworker of mine admitted to me that he had some serious ADD issues. He'd understand what he was reading but his mind was elsewhere. I stood next to him and watched as he uncontrollably shook and shivered like his sugar level was plummeting dangerously low, or he was violently cold. The manager on duty told him to order some food and eat it immediately. Now, if that's how bad one of the side effects from this medication is, and he's familiar with this medication because he's used it before, they either need to adjust his dosage or give him something with less-violent side effects. Chantix, the "quit smoking with a pill" medication causes nightmares, AND dont be too surprised if you feel like killing yourself. As if being crabby and pissy from nicotine withdrawal wasnt bad enough (this is just a witness's opinion... I dont smoke). And this was just an example. I have bad habits, one of which is grinding my jaw when agitated. I think it's an anxiety thing, because I chew my cheek a lot when in some heightened state of emotion (excited, angry, distraught). Better to have a personality tick and do it to myself than hit someone when I'm pissed. To say that I have panic attacks or anxiety problems... if a doctor told me I'm prone to either or both, I'd tell them I never noticed. If it's something that's there, I must not have realized that's what it was, because I've been this way as long as I can remember and felt that this was a normal thing for me. To say I need a pill to "stop" those jaw-grinding fits, or cheek-chewing.... no. I'll kindly turn down the medication because I'm accustomed to these ticks and would rather keep then than probably lose some part of my personality because I have drugs being pumped through me. And I realize this sounds slightly hypocritical because I'm on birth control and almost every brand claims to not be surprised if you have mood swings, weight gain, nausea (some side effects of several psych meds). Mood swings? I've been on this brand of birth control since I was 21 and I dont get mood swings that I cant already attribute to PMS or a shitty day at work. If you can shake the medication, or get a lower dosage, or even ween yourself off of it... do it.

Self-confidence? Just dont take anybody's bullshit. I have my times where I get super motivated to do something (currently, finding full-time work) and whomever I leave in the dust (a shitty part-time job, though done tactfully so) can eat it. When I've set my mind to something, there is no stopping me. If you try and hold me back, all you'll get is left behind. If I've had a bad day, I just recluse and stay away from people at the first chance, so I can regather my bearings. Bad days make me feel weak. If I've had a good day, all I try and do is carry it onward to the next day and the next and so on. Being able to do that helps build you up. And again, letting peoples' bullshit just bounce off you. It takes work and there are days where it's a bit tougher than others but really, just turn the situation around. "Your life is miserable, mine is not. I'm not okay with you sharing your shit with me."

I havent gotten the pressure from anyone really to have kids. One time, a group of women who brought their kids into Applebee's asked if I had any and I said "no" and one said profusely, "You would be a great mom." I think I bowed out of that gently by saying "Nah, I'll stay the cool aunt instead" and continued making faces at one of the kids. I havent gotten any pressure from either of my sisters, nor my dad or stepmom. I'm not married, so I think that plays a big part in it. But I know I've already had a small talk with my middle sister, saying "You'll have the twins, Jeri will have all boys and I'll have non so I can spoil them all rotten."

Havoc brings up another good point. Say you have kids but then years down the road, you get a divorce/break up with your partner. Having kids makes it that much harder to cut ties with said partner, and you have to stay civil to each other the good of the kids well-being.