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What Are You Thinking?


StormKnight

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6 minutes ago, Draco1958 said:

Maybe the person differentiates between building and trouble shooting?  Personally I see you like me, can build and trouble shoot and repair although I know I still can use help but I believe you 99% won't need help.

The reason the comment threw me a bit was because we were 10 minutes into a conversation about towers, motherboard specs, software, power sources, gaming and video cards upgrades and full system overhauls.  I made mention that in all my years of building computers, I had never heard 5 beeps in a row and I thought it may have had something to do with the chipset of my motherboard because I had built it back in 2008 with only one upgrade since that time.  So, yeah, I didn't know if they were being serious or if my words came across like a grownup from a Peanuts skit.

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37 minutes ago, TronRP said:

The reason the comment threw me a bit was because we were 10 minutes into a conversation about towers, motherboard specs, software, power sources, gaming and video cards upgrades and full system overhauls.  I made mention that in all my years of building computers, I had never heard 5 beeps in a row and I thought it may have had something to do with the chipset of my motherboard because I had built it back in 2008 with only one upgrade since that time.  So, yeah, I didn't know if they were being serious or if my words came across like a grownup from a Peanuts skit.

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Waa Waa Waa WaaWaa Waa

You'll have to private message me.  I want to know who it was.  See if I am right about who it was.  I'm curious.

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I'm really not looking forward to the hectic pace of what tomorrow will bring.

9am meeting at the bank

2pm Dr. appt in Southfield

Afternoon Monchichi pick ups

5:30pm vehicle appt in Farmington Hills

Dinner and home in there somewhere...

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I hope the people who pick up the garbage this week do a better job than the ones who picked up last week.  They dropped trash all over the street and then ran over it on their way off the block, so I ended up scraping kitty litter patties up off the street.  There was nothing I could do with the smashed beans, so I left them for the birds and threw the flattened can away.

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It is never easy speaking to family that have not been around me for a while.  They don't ever seem to care how I communicate, but they never seem to hesitate to let me know that they "can't take that right now".  They don't realize what they are saying is "I can't take you right now".  And all I can think is, then don't ask me for my opinion because me being me is the way you are going to receive it.

I hate to say it, but this is the type of thing that cause me to stop talking for a year...and no one even noticed.  But that was when I was in my late teens.  If I stop talking now, people will notice, but I hate feeling like crying every time I know I'm about to speak with a family member who can't take me right now.

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From time to time, I watch shows that feature people who suffer from disabilities being welcomed into various types of communities with open arms.  I watch how their families feel proud of them for being able to make friends despite their disabilities.  And I hate to say it, but sometimes wish my way of speaking was considered a disability because then people might accept me for the way I am and feel proud of the fact that I have to overcome so much just to get up the nerve to speak because I know I am going to be remembered as loud, overly outspoken, off the richter scale, sounding like I'm upset/angry, overbearing, yelling because I didn't want other people to say something...and that's just the things that have been said to my face. 

Maybe if I was able to speak like everyone else, I wouldn't feel so self-conscious trying to sound what is considered acceptable or "normal". 

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I think this is why I like playing with kids so much.  They don't seem to have a problem if you laugh a little too loud or speak a little too fast.  They can laugh right along with you, even through the awkward stuff...they just don't care.  If it sounds like fun, they will laugh.  If it sounds like they are in trouble, they will try to make it right (usually).  That's it.  Pure and simple.

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