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Yes, being single again blows. I am not good at approaching girls and asking them out. I just wanna snuggle and kiss someone. I enjoy pleasing women and my new apartment is cold and silent. I am doing everything I can to keep busy and keep my mind off of being alone again. It sucks! Hugs to all of you out there alone feeling what I feel

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  • 2 weeks later...

I am of course single, however I have become a step closer to nirvana as I have finally become enlightened to the realization that relationships are for pussies. Why would I want someone to sleep with every night, grow old with, mother their children, love uncondituonally, have their back and be by their side no matter what, cook their food, suck their...yeah and have sex whenever they break out the rope and want to tie me up or grab my hands and dominate me to where I cannot resist,...yea..also misc...stuff chics do..like old school chics...old school freaky chics...

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I am of course single, however I have become a step closer to nirvana as I have finally become enlightened to the realization that relationships are for pussies. Why would I want someone to sleep with every night, grow old with, mother their children, love uncondituonally, have their back and be by their side no matter what, cook their food, suck their...yeah and have sex whenever they break out the rope and want to tie me up or grab my hands and dominate me to where I cannot resist,...yea..also misc...stuff chics do..like old school chics...old school freaky chics...

verrrry subtle... ;-)

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  • 4 weeks later...

I am single, a month or more ago my girlfriend chose to end our relationship for the third year in a row this time assassinating it with a sniper text message while I was on job in Nashville. This time honestly admitting that she didn't care anymore and cared only for her self interests and focusing on her dream of being a great dj. For three years she hit theses phases where she cut off into her own world each time a different obsession of interests and internet to escape reality but always came back (suspiciously for my money and for me to take care of her wrecked life, an unconfirmed suspicion but highly credible) She chose the well timing of near after my sociopathic fathers sudden death, my disownment of my family, mothers bankruptcy, and in the final week my finding out I was terribly I'll with a dental infection that had gotten into my bloodstream and going after my heart. Within a few days I received the text message announcement that it was the end again and I'm a "downer"... not my fault bad things were happening to me, but she didn't care anymore the way I cared for her. I was emotionally blank to it and still fully haven't processed all of it, but after going to Michigan to pick up my belongings and returning to work on the road I have terrible insomnia, no appetite, and began to drink vodka every night for a week, then quit eating entirely causing an extreme blood sugar crash that could have killed me I hit the floor so hard. Idk. The relationship had really been dead from her end for sometime, we hadn't slept together in over 7 months, I was only home from jobs a few days every month. It was all messed up she just got further and further away and nothing I tried brought her back. I think this is the last time the two of us will do this dance... and I have the feeling single will become my new existence although I prefer a relationship. Unlike my friends /coworkers I have not got "game" or snazzy pick up lines and while they could get women everywhere and not give a damn, I am opposite of them I guess, I would rather find a person to give a damn about. Idk, life really is a downer at times now at times and I don't see the way back out. I work 21-26 days of non stop 14 hour days at a time and go back off the road only a few days, idek where I would find the time to build another relationship from scratch, but I imagine the healthiest thing for me to do is put her completely out of my head and just go about being lost or focused on work. That is my rant for now, I'm sure I forgot to say some kind of detail s about it, the insomnia has made me exhausted and drained, or melted brains

:(

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I dont know why I go to psychics just to be told that I am such a unique person who basically never fit in never was or will be a sheep and that the world needs fascinating little creatures like me to make it interesting. Anyhow...so basically even though she says oh one day you will find a man that finds you fascinating..so in laymans terms...she basically said " you are way too much of an oddball to have a soul mate, twin flame, or whatever...theres no way in hell anyone can love you due to how weird you are...finding someone to tolerate you would be as difficult as finding out what god is...oh but at least my spirit guides are always up my ass..yay.

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I dont know why I go to psychics just to be told that I am such a unique person who basically never fit in never was or will be a sheep and that the world needs fascinating little creatures like me to make it interesting. Anyhow...so basically even though she says oh one day you will find a man that finds you fascinating..so in laymans terms...she basically said " you are way too much of an oddball to have a soul mate, twin flame, or whatever...theres no way in hell anyone can love you due to how weird you are...finding someone to tolerate you would be as difficult as finding out what god is...oh but at least my spirit guides are always up my ass..yay.

That's about why I can envision being permanently trapped in being single. I'm too weird and the closest weirdest person in the world to me in the end just didn't want to try to understand me anymore. My freinds are all weird but nowhere near as i. Most people can't even understand what music I listen to, just one... tried to hang on as long as possible but she just kept slipping away. F! it, I'm done with my past and I'll make a new future as weird or not weird as I want it to be. I just live day to day for now, things can't always be hell i guess.

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That's about why I can envision being permanently trapped in being single. I'm too weird and the closest weirdest person in the world to me in the end just didn't want to try to understand me anymore. My freinds are all weird but nowhere near as i. Most people can't even understand what music I listen to, just one... tried to hang on as long as possible but she just kept slipping away. F! it, I'm done with my past and I'll make a new future as weird or not weird as I want it to be. I just live day to day for now, things can't always be hell i guess.

I am sorry that you were hurt and letting go is hard but you cant hold onto a fallacy..thank her for not wasting another second of your time...time is so precious...

Our energy should not be spent or wasted on someone who doesnt care about you...dont let another person push you further into the darkness and deeper into your own personal hell...because in the end you are left to fight your way back all alone...shit, I know the need to have and give love but I am pretty much at the point where I, who truly believes in soulmates and following the path of the universe and that we get signs beyond our control that show us our path to those people but I am just a weirdo I guess it seems like nobody else in this world understands.

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I am sorry that you were hurt and letting go is hard but you cant hold onto a fallacy..thank her for not wasting another second of your time...time is so precious...

Our energy should not be spent or wasted on someone who doesnt care about you...dont let another person push you further into the darkness and deeper into your own personal hell...because in the end you are left to fight your way back all alone...shit, I know the need to have and give love but I am pretty much at the point where I, who truly believes in soulmates and following the path of the universe and that we get signs beyond our control that show us our path to those people but I am just a weirdo I guess it seems like nobody else in this world understands.

I believe sorta the same, although that's been tested recently. Thank you tho.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I used to think I wanted a boyfriend but I have recently realized I just need some type of companion at this point in my life. Not to be a bitch but I think I have earned the right to at least demand respect .I have come to realize that I have never actually been with a man...just boys...because I think men intimidate me...I feel Its probably because of my dad...so I think I may have a daddy thing. ..maybe thats why I deal with immature childlike guys who cant develop past a certain stage..so no more...I used to thing women were being bitches when they compared boys and men but its true....there realky is a difference.

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I agree with you Kat. There is a difference. A real man strives to please a woman and show her respect at the same time. Boys haven't developed that awareness yet or maturity for that matter. But don't be intimidated by men. Sadly, some would use that to their advantage. Believe in yourself.

As for myself, I hate asking people out. I'm not very good at it so I will simply wait until I run into someone who wants to hang out casually as friends and if something happens it happens. Friendships are valuable to me so I await this instead of searching for love. I have learned to stop looking for it. It may or it may never find you. I am learning to just be content with myself and rebuild myself physical, mentally, and spiritually.

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I agree with you Kat. There is a difference. A real man strives to please a woman and show her respect at the same time. Boys haven't developed that awareness yet or maturity for that matter. But don't be intimidated by men. Sadly, some would use that to their advantage. Believe in yourself.

As for myself, I hate asking people out. I'm not very good at it so I will simply wait until I run into someone who wants to hang out casually as friends and if something happens it happens. Friendships are valuable to me so I await this instead of searching for love. I have learned to stop looking for it. It may or it may never find you. I am learning to just be content with myself and rebuild myself physical, mentally, and spiritually.

yea me too...trying to balance my life out.....I am literally parked sitting in my car suppose to meet someone and I just dont want to ..lmao...Its like I give up.
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  • 2 weeks later...

I feel part of the growing Western demograph of men who don’t chase women for sexual or romantic relationships, in the same way one doesn’t risk drinking fatal poison, similar in this sense to Japan’s grass eaters. I have immense freedom because of this. There is little to no drama in my life. As long as I pay the bills, I can pursue all the things that make me happy, and avoid all the things which do not, and there is no one to cause the opposite. Its ironic to have romantic traditionalists talk about how men are falling into some kind of permanently single “perpetual adolescence” as though it should be thought of as a punishment or oddity. But if you really want a group to be disposable its best rid anything in them that resembles adolescence.

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Good luck Kat! Stay strong for yourself.

thanks! I did end up going, he played a guilt trip on me like saying but I bought you flowers...so I felt bad, so I go the next day he's texting me like a pyscho path and maybe the day after he thought he was in love with me, wanted me to literally move right in with and get married...needless to say I took that as a lesson nomore online dating sites and deleted my profiles.. I don't even know how to date, I suck at it, it's always weird to me.
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I was so stupid about love before...If I go on a date its never pleasing, I'm not interested in any guys I meet...it's basically whatever...I really just have given up and resign to the fact I am not meant to have love from another...due to the pattern with males in my life...yes, I have abandonment issues and issues about rejection...my dad committed suicide, and my daughter's father, we were engaged at the time but he died literally the day after he proposed which was Xmas eve, and my marriage bombed.. so if I didn't have abandonment issues from all that than I would probably not be normal. I used to have a problem where I trusted too easy...and to this day I beat myself up over it...There is no way that noone will get me in a moment of weakness now.

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  • 1 month later...

No longer on the self imposed exile, due to having finally figured a little out about myself. I realized that maybe I'm not so far gone after all. Only problem is now I barely have enough to cover my own expenses and rarely have extra to do things. Stuck at home most weekends watching TV, movies, or playing video games. Not that there is anything necessarily wrong with that, but it just prevents me from getting out and having opportunities to be social.

I'm frankly just tired of the constant loneliness. It gets shitty coming home to an empty house all the time. Nobody to talk to about my day, or hold hands walking down the street with, or share in my belief that everyday is halloween. Oh well, if it happens it happens. If not, more loneliness, oh what fun! :rolleyes:

Edited by DJ Nihil
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  • 5 months later...

I was so stupid about love before...If I go on a date its never pleasing, I'm not interested in any guys I meet...it's basically whatever...I really just have given up and resign to the fact I am not meant to have love from another...due to the pattern with males in my life...yes, I have abandonment issues and issues about rejection...my dad committed suicide, and my daughter's father, we were engaged at the time but he died literally the day after he proposed which was Xmas eve, and my marriage bombed.. so if I didn't have abandonment issues from all that than I would probably not be normal. I used to have a problem where I trusted too easy...and to this day I beat myself up over it...There is no way that noone will get me in a moment of weakness now.

Wow! Did I really just type this shit back in October just to read my own bullshit. I fucked up BAD with this one, back in school when I would get in trouble I would have to write sentances like Bart Simpson except mine where on paper. I never learned clearly because I just thought I found a way around writing the same thing over and over by getting a piece of carbon and thinking the teacher wouldn't notice. That's bullshit though because deep Down I knew he would. Anyhow, this rant has two points. ..one, I need to write sentances regarding the men I associate with, and other things that I need beat into my membrane; and 2) Its all one big carbon fucking copy. ..same shit, over and over. ..I dream something one day will work, knowing, like my carbon copy stunt, knowing it's all bullshit and its not going to fly and in the end, I end up in worse trouble than before. If I could and blah blah excuse after excuse about if my past wasn't like this I wouldn't be so fucked up, aim so low because I feel I deserve nothing better, well It's shit. ..I know what my problem is now, finally and I own it, noone else. I am too blame for lowering myself and for being too fucking accomadating...I made myself a target, a victim of my past. .I'm not playing that game anymore. Rejection happens when you think someone is amazing who doesn't feel the same I have finally began to trust my intuition. ..I don't want anymore lessons. I want to find happiness with someone but never again settle or let myself be hurt. If that crazy person exists wonderful, than we will find each other if not than....whatever. (grrr everyone is coupled up, settling down, getting married. ..how is it so easy to find someone who possesses the missing piece to the puzzle of you?
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  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...

Yes of course but all these guys claim to care only words is all I hear, so if they don't have that something, that compassion and genuine heart, I look right through them, beside I'm in no position to fall in love at this point however all I can think about is straight up, passionate sex..I shall sleep alone with my fantasies though, of pure, fire, passion. .sex isn't worth it without passion. ..well imo anyway.

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I really have been getting stuck on some girl's I just don't have a chance with haha. Even then I hardly try I don't ever mean to be self conscience but I open up to a friend of mine about falling in love or the fact that I kind of like being by myself XD. That's how I kind of have been for a while like on hiatus you know? So I've been single just kind of getting some thing's in my life together anyway also save's money to when you find out your with a gold digger. More or less been single for a while so kind of like it but been thinking of getting back into the scene and trying to find someone who catches my interest and someone is is just simple. Although some people these days is proves difficult from time to time lol,

Just dying to live ya know? Get it because I'm a zombie? Nevermind XP

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